The Purpose of Supervised Visitation

For your children:

  • It allows your children to maintain a relationship with both parents, something that has been found to be an important factor in their healthy adjustment to family dissolution.
  • It allows them to anticipate the visits without the stress of worrying about what is going to happen and to enjoy a safe, comfortable environment without being in the middle of their parents' conflict and/or problems.

For the custodial parents:

  • You can avoid communication or contact with a person with whom you are in conflict or by whom you might be intimidated or frightened. The plans are made by a neutral party (the visit supervisor) limiting contact before, during, or after the visits.
  • You can relax and feel comfortable allowing your child to have contact with the other parent (and even have some valuable time to yourself).

For the non-custodial parents:

  • You can be sure that your contact with your children does not have to be interrupted regardless of any personal or interpersonal challenges you may be facing.
  • If allegations have been made against you, (which is often the case when supervision is ordered), you can visit without fear of any new accusations, since there is a neutral party present to verify what happened during your time together. In using our professional service, you can be assured that the supervisors will be both neutral and objective.

Supervision in the case of parental separation:

  • When parents separate, the children often will have their primary residence with one parent, regularly spending time with the other parent. Visitation, contact, and access are words used to refer to post separation contact with the non-residential parent or other significant people such as a grandparents, siblings and other close relatives. When the courts feel it is appropriate, they may order that this contact take place in the presence of a third party often a trusted third party or Supervised Visitation professional.
  • Supervised exchanges may be court ordered or arranged by the parent, and are generally appropriate when there are no concerns about the safety of the child when they are with the other parent. Sometimes it is because one or both parents do not feel safe or comfortable interacting directly with the other parent. It is in the best interest of your children to avoid placing them in situations where they are exposed to the anger or conflict between their parents.

Supervision in the case of out-of-home placement:

  • When a child comes under the jurisdiction of Child Protective Services (CPS) and is removed from the home because of the risk of child abuse or neglect, it is usually important that the parent-child relationship continue. CPS may provide these services directly, however, due to their limited resources that may restrict the frequency, duration, and nature of the contact. In some areas, they have found it useful to contract with outside supervised visitation programs to provide those services. 
  • Since supervision in the case of out-of-home placement is generally controlled very closely by the state or local CPS regulations, the information here applies primarily to supervision in the case of parental separation.

Why not use a friend or relative rather than a  professional service, particularly when there is a fee involved?

Often there is nothing to prohibit you from using a "non-professional" relative, friend, or acquaintance. Many court orders will allow that as an option providing both parents can agree on whom to use. That often does not work out for the following reasons:

  • It may be difficult to identify someone on whom you both agree. If you are having the level of conflict where supervision was deemed necessary, then chances are very slim that you will be able to find an individual with whom both of you are comfortable and trust.
  • It may place a real strain on your relationship with that individual. Many well-meaning friends and relatives will agree to provide the service but will quickly tire of the regular commitment and/or being in the middle of your conflicts.
  • It is challenging for friends and relatives to restrain from taking sides. Once neutrality is lost, then the credibility of the "supervisor" will come into question and much of the feeling of security and safety will be gone.
  • And, finally, it may actually detract from the quality of the parent-child time together. It is often tempting to spend time interacting with the acquaintance rather than focusing on the child. Children may then come to resent the visits because they feel that they are secondary and not primary in the interaction.

How do I find a provider?

  • If you have a court order for visitation, chances are the local courts will have a list of providers in your area. Your attorney may be able to advise you about services. Check the Supervised Visitation Network ( http://www.svnetwork.net/ ) directory of Service Providers to see if there is one in your area.

How do I make sure the service will meet my needs?

  • Be sure to check the court order to see if it specifies the kind of supervision. Then check with the provider to see that all conditions can be met. Due to the limited resources available in most communities for such services, you will probably have to be flexible. Some services are open for limited times, particularly in smaller communities. Remember, this is about your children-and their needs. It may require some sacrifices on your part. Parenting is not always convenient, and we need to be sure that we do not let minor inconveniences interfere with our child's right to have time and attention from both parents. If you are the non-custodial parent, your unwillingness to arrange your schedule to fit the times available through the service may be interpreted as a lack of interest on our part, which can lead to termination of parental contact. If you are the custodial parent, your inflexibility may be seen as an effort to keep the child from the parent. This has been known to result in reversal of custody. You will probably not have any difficulty, if you can truly think about it from your child's point of view instead of your own.
  • When you contact the service, remember that this is all new and perhaps a little uncomfortable to you. They are experienced and comfortable. They will guide you through the process and do everything they can to assure that your child's needs are met. Try not to displace your anger against the other parent, the system, or the unfairness of the situation onto them. They are not responsible for the fact that you are being asked to use the service. They are there to help and to do everything they can to make what may be to you a bad situation, as good for everything as possible.                                                                                                                                          Adapted from the Supervised Visitation Network website